Our Witness
by TamyG
Summary: What happens when Bruce leaves a bored clown back at his manor? ... BxJ slash ... The ending is little related to my story "The Pain in Our Chests"


The lean man stirred in his bed, he patted next to him searching for his beloved but his hand simply laid over empty sheets and failed to find the body he yearned for. He was too lazy to open his eyes so he rolled over the wide bed for confirmation, but unfortunately, he rolled too far.

"OUCH!" the man screamed in pain and placed a rubbing hand over his shoulder trying to sooth the pain of the fall. He then slowly stood and with slightly opened green eyes he scanned each and every inch of the spacious room, "Brucie?"

A sudden knock on the door intercepted him followed by the voice of the butler, "Mr. Joker , are you alright? May I come in?"

"Yah Alfie, just a little bruise." The Joker answered with a sleepy voice, " And don't you worry, I'm wearing my briefs so you can come in."

The old man slowly opened the door and as he stepped in he inquired, "What happened? I hear a loud thud coming from here."

"A little fall." the Joker shrugged, "Where is Bruce?"

"He left quite early today, someone called from the company regarding an emergency." Alfred replied.

"Aha... After all what we did last night...Damn I feel used." the Joker remarked with a chuckle.

"EHM!" The butler coughed curtly before speaking, "Your breakfast has been prepared downstairs as per your liking. If you shall need anything, I will try my best to serve you as I will be quite busy today."

"Thank you." the Joker replied while stretching then added teasingly as he tugged on his briefs, "but my needs can't be serve by you my Dear Alfie."

Alfred growled at his obscenity; the clown never ceased in coming up with a crude remark to annoy him, despite Bruce's continuous pleading.

"Good day to you, Mr. Joker." Alfred scowled before storming out of the room.

The Joker let out one of his crazy, long laughter "God! Teasing the geezer never gets old!"

As soon as the laughter ceased he headed toward the bathroom to wash up and get dressed. "Sexy as ever." He smirked as he looked at his reflection in bathroom's mirror. "Well then, breakfast is next."

He left the room and went to the kitchen where Alfred has prepared one of his delicious meals. "I wonder how Brucie manages to stay fit with all of this yumminess…" the Joker mumbled while having a slice of pancake topped with melted butter and strawberry jam; he was extremely thin, as Bruce often points out, so he wouldn't worry about it.

Once he was done with his breakfast, he looked at the clock hanging above the sink, it was thirty minutes pass eleven; it was pretty rare for the clown to sleep in for this long. "Well seems like last night have drained me!" the Joker chuckled then wondered, "Sooooo, what's next?"

The Joker hummed as he headed to the living room and slammed into the couch as soon as he reached there. He grabbed the remote and switched on the TV.

"Lets see if there's anything interesting." He said as he flipped from one channel to another, "Boring… boring… BORING!" he shouted with a pout and threw the remote next to him, "Stupid TV!"

He stood and went to the next room, the library. The whole length of one side of the room was made of shelves that carried an enormous collection of books, "What the hell does Bruce do with all of these?"

He looked around for anything that might grab his attention, "Hamlet, Macbeth, Othello…Oliver Twist? Seriously? This is the most boring collection ever!" He went to the next shelf, "AHA! Now this is quite interesting…hehehehe"

The clown grab the book that incited his interest and went to the one place that Bruce asked him not to go to unaccompanied, the Batcave; there's always something exciting about doing the opposite of what has been told, especially if it came form the Batman, "Guess old habits die hard." The Joker giggled as he entered the cave through the secret entrance.

"So, what do we need?" the Joker mumbled as he opened the book and placed it over on of the tables, "Shell parts, shell hemisphere…Stars? What the hell is… oh it's written down here… Potassium Nitrate, sulfur…hmmm, hope Brucie has all of these somewhere in here."

The Joker wondered around the Batcave, searching for the ingredients and managed to find almost everything except for the Potassium Nitrate. "Where can I find some?" he muttered to himself then promptly exclaimed, "Oh yah!"

The clown ran upstairs and started calling, "Alfred! Alfieeeeeee!"

"Yes Mr. Joker?" the butler's voice came from one of the rooms.

"Where are you? Come here I need something from you." the Joker replied.

The butler obliged to the Joker's request and came to where he was but wore a rather worried expression as he asked, "Yes Mr. Joker, what do you need?"

"Don't worry Alfie I've my eyes only on Brucie." The Joker winked then added, "Do you have some Salt Petre?"

"For God's sake, would you stop this vulgarity?" the butler scowled then cleared his throat and added, "Yes I think we have some in the kitchen, may I ask why would you require such an ingredient?"

"Just a little surprise!" the Joker replied with a grin.

"How reassuring." Alfred sighed sardonically, "Follow me."

After getting the last ingredient, the Joker went back to the Batcave and remained there for hours.

Almost quarter to ten, "Joker! Alfred! I'm home." Bruce called out.

"Welcome back Master Bruce." The butler greeted his master and offered to carry his coat.

"Where's Joker?" Bruce asked as he looked around.

"I'm not quite sure. Last I saw him was almost three hours ago when he asked me for some Salt Petre." The butler replied.

"Salt Petre? What is tha-" Bruce was about to say but got intercepted by a booming sound of an explosion, "What the hell?!"

"I think the sound came from the Batcave sir!" the butler stated hurriedly as he walked as fast as possible in the cave's direction.

When they reached the entrance of the cave, the antique clock, they saw dark smoke escaping through the little space behind it.

"What in the world is happening down there?!" Bruce exclaimed with an alarmed expression.

The two men proceeded toward the clock cautiously and the moment Bruce opened it, thick black smoke invaded the room making it hard to breath and look.

"Stay here Alfred and open the windows, I will go down stairs and see what's happening down there." Bruce ordered before covering his nose and mouth with a cloth and disappearing behind the smoke.

"Yes Master, please be careful." The butler replied with a worried tone.

As the billionaire took careful steps downstairs, he called with a muffled voice, "Joker! Joker! Are you down here?!"

"Brucie-" the Joker replied through coughs and what sounded like giggles, "I'm right here!"

Few minutes later, the smoke had finally cleared up, thanks to the fire system, and Bruce was able to locate the Joker, who was laying on the ground coughing and giggling at the same time.

"Joker! Are you alright?" Bruce hurried toward the giggling man and offered a hand to lift him up.

"Yah… yah I'm fine." The Joker replied as he grab the offered hand that pulled him up into a standing position.

"Your face looks like it has been smashed with a bag of charcoal!" Bruce exclaimed in disbelief as he saw the Joker's stark white face covered entirely in black. "What the hell Jokes?!" he growled angrily, "What happened in here?! And haven't I told you not to come down here without me?"

"Oh Brucie…" the Joker giggled, "Just a harmless experiment that took an explosive turn."

"Come here," Bruce demanded as he grabbed the clown's wrist, "Do I need to hire a damn babysitter for you?!"

"Haha! Funny! You were out since I woke up, Alfred was busy all day and I was bored!" the Joker snapped with a pout, "Well, until I found this interesting book on how to make fireworks."

"What fireworks? That was more like a C-4!" the billionaire retorted sarcastically.

As soon as the two men emerged from the entrance, the worried butler ran towards them and asked, "Are you alright Master Bruce?"

"Yah we are ok, just a mad clown in the house." Bruce replied and shot the Joker an angry look. In reply, the Joker frowned and looked the other way, he also tried to release his hand from Bruce's grip, but the latter was way stronger; he pulled the clown and stomped toward his room.

"What the hell were you thinking?" Bruce shouted once the couple was alone in his room.

"I already told you, I was B-O-R-E-D! BORED! You were busy the whole damn week!" the Joker snapped back, "I don't get why you are mad! There's no real harm done to your precious Batcave!"

Bruce stared at the clown incredulously "Just go and wash up!" he scowled then looked away and added, "I don't want to talk about it anymore."

The Joker wasn't done arguing yet, but for a brief moment before Bruce managed to look away, he noticed hurt in his eyes and so, the clown decided to just let it go and went to the bathroom to wash up as Bruce suggested.

When the Joker came out of the bathroom, all washed up with no traces of the earlier incident, he noticed that Bruce was sitting on his side of the bed with his back facing him and next to Bruce lay a lavender silk shirt along a pair of purple, pinstripe trousers. The Joker had no idea why Bruce was hurt, yet he felt a pang of guilt. He hopped over the bed then crawled to the broad back of his lover and wrapped his hands around him.

"I'm sorry Bruce." The Joker apologized as he embraced his beloved, "I didn't me to hurt you."

Bruce placed a hand over the Joker's forearm and asked, "Do you really think so little of me?"

"NO! No Bruce…w-why are saying that?" the Joker stammered.

Bruce turned around to face the confused clown and cupped his white, flustered cheek, "Do you have any idea how scared I was when I saw you laying there surrounded by the smoke?"

"You mean…y-you were worried about me?" the clown questioned with widened eyes.

As a response, the billionaire pulled the clown into his chest hugging him as tight as he could and whispered in a weak voice, "very…"

At that moment, the clown finally understood what he has done and felt butterflies at the bottom of his stomach at the sudden realization; Bruce was worried about him. "I'm so so sorry Brucie!" he cried out anxiously, "It's just that… I'm not used to someone being worried about me that's why I thou-"

However, the Joker's panicked explanation was cut off when a pair of lips slammed into his, locking them into a deep, devouring kiss.

Seconds later, "Unfortunately, as long as you have me you'll have to get used to it." Bruce stated with a relieved smile.

"Thank you." The Joker replied with an adoring one, "By the way, what's with the new clothes?"

"Oh shit!" Bruce cried as he looked at the clock, "Just wear them as fast as you can and meet me up on the roof."

"W-what… why?" the Joker asked but the billionaire had already left the room. He looked at the clock, it's almost midnight, "Why the roof?"

Once the Joker was done, he went up the roof and when he opened the door, he found Bruce staring up at the sky and behind him laid a delicately woven blanket; on the blanket was a set of two plates of grilled steak with vegetables and mashed potatoes, a basket of sliced bread, a butter dish, two wine glasses and a bottle of wine in a bucket of ice.

"Bruce?" the Joker called out with a hint of confusion.

"Come here." The billionaire replied without looking back and pointed at the sky, "Look."

The clown strode next to the billionaire and looked up in the direction his finger was pointing at, "A quarter moon!" the Joker exclaimed.

Bruce turned to face the clown with a beaming smile, "Yup, it has been a year since that day."

The Joker couldn't stop himself from blushing wildly as he sheepishly said, "Thank you Brucie, I love you."

"I love you too Jokes." Bruce replied then placed a peck on the red cherry lips, "I'm sorry I haven't been around this week. I just wanted to finish everything so that we could spend this weekend undisturbed."

"Who knew the Batman would be so romantic?" the Joker teased as he grinned at his blushing lover, who looked the other way to avoid the clown's lusting gaze.

"Come on, lets try fattening this thin body of yours." Bruce smirked, trying to change the subject; he felt so embarrassed by the Joker's earlier remark, since he never considered himself as the romantic one.

However, the Joker had different thoughts in mind as he pulled back the billionaire into his embrace and whispered seductively, "Then let me devour you and let the last quarter be our witness once again."

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**This fic took me forever! So leave a review if you liked it! And check my profile for more fics and future updates!**


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